My advice to u, which u might regard as not helpful at all, is to look way beyond and deeper than just toys and pills....
a 3rd party will never help u if u cant help urself...
it is psychological my friend.... u have to help her rediscover her appetite for life not just sex,.,im sure there is alot more that she doesnt feel for anymore in her life not just sex..
when u start not enjoying instincts that are made to help u survive, like sex, food, .... u simply die, emotionally, physically, or both..
she should feel like a teenager again, she should feel DESIRED, u both have to feel jelouse around each other by other people... toys, role playing ... etc helps a good life to be better not remedy a troubled one...
counseling i dont believe in it, they are people that take ur money to tell u do things that u already know or dont but prove to be worthless..
back in teenage years we had all the conflicting hormones yet we enjoyed everyth, coz it all felt experimental... try to experience new thins together my friend, slowly yet surely, ur sex life will improve